Twitter Lady-gasm Truths: Rachel Bloom Is An Orgasm Equality Hero

Rachel Bloom Schools Twitter on Lady-gasms

I just started watching Crazy Ex Girlfriend. I'm on episode 3, and I already have an SSL Review to do for it (which will be positive). However, before I started watching this show, I caught some buzz about the creator/star's epic rant earlier this year on Twitter about basically all the shit this here movie and blog are about. So, what I want to say about that is fuck yeah, Rachel Bloom!

So, she basically saw a CNN article

about the the Orgasm Gap (i.e. women are orgasming much less than men during sex), and she was pissed that it didn't even mention the clit until halfway down. For real, the article was all like,

'geez-oh-pete guys! What could possibly be causing women to orgasm less than men???? Could it be evolution making women have variable abilities to achieve orgasm?? Could it be women are so darn nervous about their bodies?? Could it be stigma against women initiating sex?? Could it be our clits are too far from their vaginal openings?? Golly gee - why oh why can't women just come from getting fucked up the vag hole like we want them to?? I guess there's no possible answer.' 

She, rightly, pointed out that this article, like most on the topic, was deeply focused on women's ability to orgasm during intercourse...because that's apparently the only way of lady-gasming anyone cares about. She also rightly pointed out THE CLIT. Seriously, women need their clit stimulated to orgasm, so if we live in a world obsessed with penises-in-vaginas and rarely depict, discuss or engage the clit in sexual situation, could it possibly be that - oh, I don't know - the main reason women aren't orgasming more during sex is because WOMEN'S CLITS DON'T GET STIMULATED MUCH DURING SEX. Just a little ol' thought. I mean, men need their penises stimulated for orgasm as much as women need their clits stimulated, and wouldn't you know it, their penises are pretty much the focus of any sexual activity they are a part of. and guess what?!? Men don't seem to have a group orgasm problem.

Why I Do So Love Her Rant

1 I love this because she says as boldly and clearly as anyone I've seen speak on this (and this includes most progressive sexperts and sex educators) that women would be orgasming more if we all just collectively realized that women orgasm from clitoral stimulation and penetration (because for real - no scientific research has ever shown that women orgasm from stimulation inside the vagina).

2 Can I just say again how much I love Bloom's rant. I love how specific and bold she is about the need for clitoral stimulation, because even well meaning, sex-positive, feminist stuff often demurs and really just kinda reminds that the clit is also important...as opposed to outright saying the the clit is THE important part and without understanding THE sole importance of the clit to female orgasm, orgasms ain't gonna happen. It reminds me of an article by Annamarie Jagose (I discuss it HERE) that really digs in on this issue, warning us that we'll be in a never ending cycle of worrying about the orgasm gap but never really fixing it unless we fully accept that intercourse on its own is not, has never been, and never will be as orgasmic for women as it is for men because it doesn't necessarily include external clitoral stimulation in the same way it necessarily provides clear penile stimulation. That is correct, Ms. Jagose, and although it is truly rare to hear people speak the truth on this, it really gives me hope to see these rare, but I venture to say increasing, bold statements from people like Ms. Rachel Bloom.

3 I particularly love that Rachel Bloom is really open and honest about this in her life personally. She admits that even being a feminist, progressive, and sexually aware women was not enough in this culture to give her the correct information about her body and her orgasms. She felt bad for many years that she had to have clitoral stimulation to come. She struggled with the cultural expectations of her orgasmic capabilities versus the reality of her experience. Her saying that is so important because it:

• informs us that coming from clitoral stimulation alone is actually not wierd. It's as normal as a man who can orgasm only from penile stimulation (sadly though, that piece of knowledge is not something we learn...ever)

• lets other women know that we all struggle with this bullshit that we really shouldn't have to struggle with, and

• points out that this problem is larger than just sexually progressive vs. non progressives because the cultural misinformation goes way deeper than that, and none of us are immune - even if you were raised by hippies and got a degree in sexology - these truths of the clit are still buried.

I also love that she is addressing this AND she actually has some power over depictions of sex that she intends to use for good. In this Mic article by Anna Swartz that has a follow-up interview with Bloom about the tweets. Bloom says...

"We need to educate women about how every woman's body is different," she said. "In movies, when you see a couple having a love scene ... you never see the woman reaching down and stimulating her clitoris, or a man reaching down." 

Yes, you lovely women, YEEEEES! She is so correct, and I know that for sure because I specifically critique that exact thing in tons of movies and TV for SSL Reviews. The article goes on:

The second season of Bloom's show, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, recently ended, and it's been renewed for a third. The show airs on the CW, which means that, as Bloom said, she's limited in how much she can show in sex scenes. But she and the other writers try "as much as possible to show what sex is really like ... people coming up from going down on Rebecca, we've shown Rebecca coming up from going down on other guys," Bloom said. "We try the best we can to capture what we know to be true."

Bless you, Rachel Bloom. That gives me so much hope and joy. It's the small things that will change this culture. It will take time, but I feel like I'm seeing things happening. It's a writer for Cosmo Sex Position Lists opting for inclusion of clitoral stimulation instead of incorrect references to how 'hitting the G-spot' will make a position orgasmic. It's Bridget Everett singing a hilarious song in her comedy act pointing out that ladies don't need the dick, They need mouth stimulation on their clit. And by golly, it's Rachel Bloom and the other writers trying their darndest on an extremely accessible over-the air network TV show that sexual activity, including intercourse, can and should include external clitoral stimulation (seriously, this never happens, so if I see it in Crazy Ex Girlfriend, I will flip my lid).

Go get 'em Ms. Bloom. You have officially made it onto my Orgasm Equality Heroes list. Good on ya, my lady.