SSL - The 2013 Halloween Costume Special Edition
Last year around Halloween, I talked about sexy costumes for us females and how to use them for our own lady pleasure instead of just to please the dudes - who, lucky for them, aren't being bombarded with stupid super sexified costumes even though they should be getting equal treatment in the Halloween aisle if you ask me. Anyway, If you are going the sexy cowgirl/nurse/princess/hotdog/witch/keyboard...etc... route this year, check out last years post and at least use that costume for good (clit lovin') instead of evil this year.
This year I've decided to comment on a costume I found when I typed "female orgasm Halloween costume" into Google. Yes, it might seem like a strange search, but I was just wanting an idea for a Halloween themed post, and I got kinda curious as to whether there was a pre-made costume of a female orgasm out there, and if so, what exactly it looked like. There doesn't seem to be one, but I encourage anyone with a creative mind to make that and wear it this year. Better yet, if you can make an Orgasm Equality costume I'd be even happier. Then send me the picture.
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| Orgasm Donor Costume - Remember ladies, he's there to give not get. |
Okay, so the costume is the Orgasm Donor costume. As you can see it's just a doctor's coat and a long tongue. It's part of a series of ridiculously easy pre-packaged costumes for men in a series called "General Malpractice Hospital" that are slightly raunchy. They include things like Dr. Ben Dover (includes large foam finger), Hospital Life Support Patient (complete with beer in a hat with straws - cause I guess the joke is that beer is what is supporting the patient's life?), Dr. Seymour Clearly (with eye chart and thick glasses - I guess this one isn't so raunchy). Anyway, The Orgasm Donor here clearly gives ladies free orgasms with his big ol' tongue. Let's hope Dr. Feel Good has some learning and realizes that the tongue should keep near the clit and not worry about ramming into the hole (hey, I know that there has been a lot of misconceptions about how this whole oral sex on women thing works - see this Playboy Adviser question from the 90's if you don't believe me).
I do appreciate that the Orgasm Donor costume does focus on tongue work and doesn't include a huge fake penis or something - like he'd be banging me into an orgasm or something. I'd say they got it right on that account - cause vag banging does not an orgasm make, and honestly if I were to imagine my perfect orgasm donor it would in fact be someone who was particularly adept at polishing the nub, if ya get my drift. And that brings my Halloween posts full circle because if you're going to wear one of those sexy, maybe kinda creepy (sexy SpongeBob?), costumes to that Halloween party this weekend, do yourself a favor and find yourself one of those orgasm donors. Get yours and get out. You and your weird sexy little costume deserve it!
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| Uh, I guess Ketchup is sexy. It has curves I guess. |
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| Again, SpongeBob? |
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| I don't know - sexy Girl Scout just seems bad for a variety of reasons |