BISH! A Good Website And A Kickass Video About P in V Sex
An awesome reader turned me on to a video called "Why (Penis in Vagina) Sex Can Be 'Meh'" and as always, that awesome reader was awesomely on point with the suggestion. It's a 3 minute video, and it says exactly what should be said...the male organ of sexual pleasure is stimulated, but the female organ of sexual pleasure is not, and that makes women not orgasm, men feel too much pressure to make a woman orgasm not realizing that the act is super bad for that, and everyone feel kinda shitty because what they expect is not what is.
It's from a UK website called BISH, which I also checked out and give full approval for (because nothing can happen without my approval). It's geared toward young people and created by a guy that has been in sexual education of young people for a good while. It seems that the website recently got an update with the help of a donation from Durex condoms - although the guy still has full editorial control (and it doesn't seem to me like the site is a big Durex condom ad by any means). Anyway, it has lots of good info for young people (and really anybody - I mean let's be honest - just cause someone is older doesn't mean they are that much smarter about sex), and I like the tone. Some of the highlights...
The Guide To NO- I particularly liked how it acknowledged that there is more to this than, "say no if you don't want to do something," and "stop if you hear no." Actually saying "no" can be hard, but if saying "no" to someone else means saying "yes" to ourselves, we should pat ourselves on the back for doing it even if it wasn't easy...and at the same time, we shouldn't be too hard on ourselves when we couldn't do it as forcefully as we would have liked. (Seriously, that is not just advice for teens). Also, it rightly emphasizes that people say no non-verbally and that those cues should be recognized and accepted.
What is Love? - This is an 8 minute video that reminds us love is complicated, and that the idea of "the one" is kinda bullshit, and that we need to make our own love stories and not compare ourselves to what we see and hear love should be, and that "love" is not some kind of strange energy that strikes us and takes away all our control - that too is bullshit. Again - not just for the teens.
Porn - An Educational Guide - Porn involves acting. Some things are very commonly depicted that actually aren't really that interesting/sexy/not-terrible for many people. Bodies in porn don't always look like you or your partner's bodies. Porn is largely created for hetero male fantasies. These are all things that should be clear, but truly are not, and it's a good article. I would probably add a bit more in about the huge amount of faked female orgasms as compared to the huge amount of real male orgasm, but that is because the whole terrible misinformation about the female orgasm situation is pretty much my obsession.
Anyway, check out BishUK.com, for yourself and your young folk - if you have them in your life. I love what this guy (his name's Justin Hancock btw) is doing. That darn video he made about something that so should be obvious about PinV sex, but so isn't is top notch - and he, my friends, is an Orgasm Equality Hero!